Out of office replyes

6 - I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me
until I return from holiday on 4 August. Please be patient and your mail
will be deleted in the order it was received.

5 - Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged EUR 5.99
for the first ten words and EUR 1.99 for each additional word in your
message.

4 - The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is
unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try
sending again.

(The beauty of this is that when you return, you can see how many
in-duh-viduals did this over and over).

3 - Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing
system...You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a
reply in approximately 19 weeks.

2 - I've run away to join a different circus.

AND, FINALLY, THIS ONE TAKES THE CAKE:

1 - I will be out of the office for the next 2 weeks for medical reasons.
When I return, please refer to me as 'Margaret' instead of 'Steve'.

A este jedna premia - bohuzial nepouzitelna v styku s cudzinou:

This out of office reply was created by the computer. No complaints,
comments or any other sort of pitchung are allowed.